I’m having a hard time writing lately. There’s really not that much to say or that much I care to have a one sided conversation about. That said, bringing you up to speed:
- I went to Chicago to visit my college roommate and we did a lot of drinking and eating and staying in our pjs and laughing.
- We are STILL working on the kitchen. I think this is week 4(?) of no appliances.
See, that’s it. You’re up to speed.
I’m gonna word vom some stuff: I have been pretty good about my workouts- lots of variety. I’ve also been pretty good about my eats. And I feel great about my fitness, but I don’t feel great about how I actually FEEL. I see my muscles in the mirror and I can see what they do in my workouts (and lifting sheet rock) but all I can FEEL is large (not fat..I just feel big). Is that weird? To actually confess that I’m a-ok with my body and how I am taking care of it- but I just don’t like how big my legs feel or that I almost waddle because of my thighs or that I have about 7 rolls when I sit? Meh..not sure how to explain it.
I have been walking the dogs about 1.5-3 miles a day.
I have been working out 5-6 days/week.
Ok, shh time I can’t dwell on it. Oh, except for the # of dimples I counted (or lost count of) on the back of my legs. I don’t hate that they’re there, just hate that they’re almost as prevalent as they were at my heaviest and unhealthiest.
Yeah, yeah, I drink alcohol, but that’s my splurge and I’m not giving it up because I work hard to be able to have something I enjoy.
Oh, and I started T25.
I need girl time. Sometimes- at random times during the week- I rack my brain and my contact list- in attempts to reach out to people to hang out. A.) No one responds well to last minute plans B.) people have lives. This makes me sad because sometimes I just wanna hang. Not in my house. Not with Tyler. Not with the dogs. I wanna have a full social calendar! Then I get sad when I get stuck in a dead end.
STOP BEING SO DEPRESSING JEN.
I dunno, I think social media is just overwhelming with the amount of positive things that it makes me feel inadequate?
Combine all this emotional junk with a house turned upside down mid-reno and you’ve got yourself a complete train wreck.
It’ll get better (SEE: I’M POSITIVE! Just venting)